There’s a classic Seinfeld episode where Jerry, with typical acerbic wit, points out that when you drive in a car, you’re keeping busy: “You’re looking at things, you’re steering. In an airplane, you’re just sitting there thinking, ‘I hope we don’t crash!'”
The same could be said about choosing a new state to live in; either you’re cruising and enjoying the scenery, or you’re spiralling with anxiety in your decision-making process. With the varying delights and drawdowns of each state, it’s like the roller coaster of choices, only, most of the time, you can’t anticipate the drops. At Euflora, we take the stress out of these decisions for you.
Remember Kramer’s scheme for New York state-wide bottle deposit rebates? Sometimes, it feels like we’re trying to uncover a hidden loophole to get the most out of our state. But what if we could just empirically know the benefits and choose without the roller coaster ride of apprehension? Well, wouldn’t that be a treat! Luckily for us, we’ve got the state sorter at Euflora, like a candy store but for decision making.
Do you crave the cool sea breeze of the West Coast, or perhaps, the soulful charm of the South? Do you want to bask in the sun-drenched beaches of Florida or hike the spectacular elevations of Colorado? This isn’t a question of whether you want a black-and-white cookie (they’re both good!), but more on the lines of “which half do you want more?”
In each state, there’s a unique but quintessential rhythm that moves like a jazz symphony; the blaring horns of bustling New York City, the soft tap-tap-tap of rainfall in Washington, the audible silence in Alaskian wilderness, or the Maraichi strummings of Arizona. It’s comparable to George’s understanding of relationship races, sometimes, you are just incompatible with a state’s rhythm and you lose the race.
Does the boisterousness of the city gel with your pulse or does the languid pace of a small town make your heart sing? With Euflora’s state sorter, it’s like that time when Elaine had to choose among her suitors – the choices may be many, but you know there’s only one that’s right for you.
Imagine if Newman had access to such a service – perhaps he wouldn’t have agonized so much about moving to Hawaii, with all its delectable donuts near the beach! Euflora takes the guesswork out of such big decisions. It’s your virtual concierge, serving up well-researched, neatly-categorized state info faster than the Soup Nazi’s ladle.
But remember, unlike Jerry’s relationships that usually ended with “it’s not you, it’s me,” the motto here is “it’s not the state, it’s you.” Your state of residence should fit like a glove; your lifestyle, your dreams, your needs. And Euflora is here to ensure you make the right choice.
So, the next time you’re weighing the pros and cons of [insert state here], let our state sorter be your guide for a smoother transition. After all, it’s real and it’s spectacular!